I haven’t written much on the subject because… well, I’ve been too tired to do it, and when I do have energy I’d rather spend it on the house. Every day brings more change and it feels a little more like my home. We are all moved in, except we’re still spending time at the old place cleaning and trying to get every penny of our security deposit back. It’s so strange, going back over there. There are stains on the walls from where something was leaning for years and lighter patches of floor from where a rug was settled. There are these collections of Maya’s hair all over the place that were just comfortable hiding here or there- they’re like tumbleweeds now in the empty space. I’m glad that we lived there while we did- it was a good space for us, so many firsts! Although, with only a week under my belt here at the new house, I can already feel how much easier it is to live here. There’s just so much storage, so much more breathing room, so much more functional space! Plus, a bathtub. A BATHTUB! I’m feeling really good coming home to this place.
I was so excited through this whole process, and down to the move in day I was thoroughly focused. Then, about two days after the move, I felt sort of… sad. I was thinking a lot about my past- high school mostly. I was flipping through images in my mind of driving with my best friend in the summer, with a fresh pack of cigarettes and wind in my hair. I remembered us singing Lonesome Road in perfect harmony in the stairwell of a downtown parking structure, unswayed by the people walking below us. Memories of walking along the railroad tracks, and of writing poetry in the graveyard. I remembered laying in the grass with that boy I liked and that uncomfortable but awesome feeling in the pit of my stomach. Then back to baby and house and what to unpack next… It was weird. Then I realized… that was a time when I had a freedom that I’ll likely never have again. I had little responsibility, no need for commitment, and I felt energized and young. It wasn’t just the lack of responsibility either, that made that time so free. It was my mind back then, just that time in my youth. Now I am rooted in a way that I never was before. I’ve got a partner, a baby, a dog, a house, a different and more grown-up mind. I love my life, I want this life, I’ve chosen it. However, I found in those first few days that I had a bit of commitment-phobia. Strange, but I let it take its course and I found that I felt better one morning. I was just laying there, all warm and happy, and I felt good to have all the responsibility I do now. I’m loving my new house!
Here she is:
View from the side. You can see that white building at the end of the yard on the left- our garage/Jeff’s shop.
Through the dining room window. It’s not a huge yard, but it’s quite a bit bigger than what I had before, and I’m SO EXCITED to be a serious urban farmer. I’m gonna grow grow grow. The 2/3 of the yard by the garage are well lit all day, so I’m going to concentrate the garden there and in the front and side yards. I’ve gotta start planning!
Just a few from inside- I’ll have more when rooms are totally finished, but we’re still painting and unpacking and stuff, so these are just teasers.
Just so you can get an idea about the colors. I’ve always wanted a yellow kitchen!
The windows are so nice and big and everywhere in this house.
And for fun:
We got this little recliner off the side of the road- it’s just silly and we didn’t really see it ending up anywhere but the basement. Turns out babies LOVE IT! I love little John’s face in the first one. They’ve both grown so much lately.
This last one is from Jeff- I love the perspective.
Quote of the day:
"At the worst, a house unkept cannot be so distressing as a life unlived." -Dame Rose Macaulay