A thought I had today…
Closure is overrated. Why is it that when a relationship ends we need to know everything in order to move on? Or even worse, when someone dies and you feel unfinished with that person, do you beat yourself up for eternity? I guess this was provoked by the fact that I have been refused closure. It has been a good lesson in patience though, and although I think my heart is a little harder (never less able to love, but weathered) I needed to be denied this closure I think. I think that if I am to get more information about this heartbreak of mine, I need to not be expecting it. It’s better that way.
This realization has been sad for me in a way. It means that I’m OK with moving on. It means I won’t go chasing after an answer to all of my questions. It means the questions that I have are less important to me than the growth that took place in this pain. It means that I no longer have to hang on her every word for validation. It means I love myself more.
Thoughts on this are welcome.
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Closure; A means to an end or a mispelled tv show?
Everybody seems to see closure as a good thing. Everyone always needs ‘closure’. It allows you to say “Ok, that part of my life is done now.”
But can you get by without it? It’s hard. You constantly think “Well maybe there’s still a chance…”
We need to know there’s a reason things are the way they are. But being ‘denied closure’ as you put it is a reason in itself. If someone won’t communicate with you then clearly it is the end. You don’t beat yourself up for eternity; it takes a lil while but eventually you do manage to move on.
I had no jokes. Just adding to what you were thinking about without actually applying any real insight.
It means the questions that I have are less important to me than the growth that took place in this pain.
Agreed, and well stated. This is an important truth that is too often overlooked.