…keeps stir-craziness at bay!
Lately I’ve had one big thing each day to keep me occupied and active. I tell you this has worked wonders for me! I can do this if that’s all it takes. I can totally find one thing to do that gets me out every day. Even on slow days where no one is available and I’m all alone with Vera- I can still pop her in the sling and walk to the co-op for some eggs or something.
I feel lately like things are so do-able. Vera certainly slows me down and takes time and attention, but I feel confident that I can be peaceful and patient about it and avoid frustration by good planning and a go-with-the-flow attitude. This is my goal. Sometimes I’ll find that she whimpers and needs me right when I’m about to do something I’ve been waiting to do for a while, and I have to remind myself that this is the only time she will need me like this. Soon I’ll be swooning over other people’s babies remembering when… right? That’s what they all seem to do. I have this very strong feeling that I can’t become impatient about this stuff- otherwise I will really miss out and I’ll just make life harder for myself.
Like today, she’s been really awake and active and I’ll be able to unload half of the top rack of the dishwasher, or fold part of the laundry in the basket, or read one friend’s entry here, another there… I can’t believe I managed to make rice pudding for dinner tonight. Anyway, my point is, she’s been wide-eyed and beautiful today, and although I wasn’t able to finish a lot, I was able to see her smile about a dozen times. I’m not just talking gas smiles but big old “I’m happy” smiles. I don’t know if they really were “I’m happy” smiles, but I do know that when I can make her do that with a tickle or a kiss I don’t know that I’ll be able to stop. And so really, who gives a shit about the dishwasher?
We went to see Jeff’s grandma. It was awesome, as usual, and she gave me a bunch of canvases and painting supplies that she isn’t using anymore. I think it’ll be nice to start painting again. I’m excited to start doing lots of things again now that I have the brain space. Maybe I’ll even write a new song… Time never really was the issue, even though I thought it was. I always make time for things I really want to do. It’s being mentally and emotionally tired that really keeps me from exploring new territory.
Our upstairs neighbor and dear dear friend, although I love him very much, is a complete slob. He knows this. We know this. And yet, I still am fascinated by the fact that despite the trash can being located less than 3 feet away from this very spot, he still can’t seem to dump the ashtray in it. It’s the only time I break my Don’t-Ever-Touch-Another-Cigarette Rule.
Ok, you may remember that last fall our precious front porch rocking chair was stolen. Yes, STOLEN. I couldn’t believe it either. I spend a great deal of time out there and I couldn’t imagine a summer spent without it. On our way yesterday to Jeff’s parent’s house we noticed this brown beauty on the side of the road. But lo! There was not enough room in the backseat because there was too much baby! We had to wait until that night to go back and hope it was still there for us- which it was. I am very pleased.
Quote of the day:
“As if you could kill time without injuring eternity.” -Henry David Thoreau